I was kinda wonderin about this one. Seemed like a Sharknado kinda movie, but, seriouser. It is, but not. While dramatic, it definitely brings a comedic kiss to it, as the opening sequence reveals. Still serious, it definitely takes it in some darkly humorous lenses. I don’t think that’s a real sentence. But I don’t think this is a real movie. Wait. No. It is a real movie. I just watched it. Damn you, Cocaine Bear, and your alterings of reality! Based on a trues story.
1985. Chatahoochie National Forest, Georgia. Normally, a nice place to visit. Except the wildlife, who can be a little wild. And the punks that use it as a hunting ground for tourists. Until something else uses it for … dammit. The bear finds a shitload of cocaine dropped from a drug runner’s plane. The bear likes the cocaine. There’s a lot of carnage that results from this, both physically and psychologically. And Ray Liotta. Word to the wise, you ain’t getting your drugs back, bro. Because it’s a FUCKING BEAR! ON COCAINE!
This really is the horrific and realistic tale of if a bear ever got into cocaine. It is a helluva drug, Nancy Reagan even tells us so. Give it to an apex predator? Yeah, you fucked. There’s dramas by okay characters. There’s kids eating tablespoons of cocaine (which in itself is like WTF?!?). There’s the “Sheeeeit” dude from The Wire. What more can I say? It’s fucking crazy. Kudos to Elizabeth Banks here, who’s shown some good comedic chops over the years. Good family drama that’s...fucked up. Mostly because of a bear. On cocaine.
