[Guest Reviewer Jason Voorhees]: Honestly, they just hired me for a day gig for this one. Wow. This is a pile of suck. You wouldn’t think it, from the trailers and snapshots and such. But yeah. This is fuckin pretty lame. All style, no substance.
The plot? Does it matter? No. No, it does not. I missed the viewing of this during Sleazy P. Martini’s Halloween viewing of it a bit ago. I have to think the commentary and chats while it played were far superior to the movie itself.
This is just kind of the worst of the stereotypical Halloween myth and urban legend stuff all mashed together between four lame anthology stories. It tries to be “shocking” but it just falls flat every single time. Bland. Innocuous. It’s insulting, really. Looks good, though. It’s the kind of Halloween film you play in the background with the sound off for atmosphere. The rest? Yikes! If you actually watch this, do yourself a favor and just put it on mute and throw on some Goblin or Uncle Acid & the Deadbeats or somethin. Cuz, well, yeah. Mock this one with a turdkin. That’s a turd, in a pumpkin.
