Well, I made the drunken mistake of not looking up a metaphor versus an allegory a few reviews ago. I’m Sorry. I’m was Drunk. And this film is definitely one of two. You figure it out. Stupid gooogles, you think you’re so smart, do’s you’s. Always mocking us mere mortals. But at least we ain’t all living on a giant bullet train as the last vestiges of society. OR ARE WE?!?
Global Warming alarmisms creates a “fix” that, huh, surprise, fucks the Earth into a new Ice Age. Thanks, Scientists! So now all of humanity is literally encapsulated in a super-train that for some reason, can’t go below 80 miles per hour or it blows up. Shit. That’s the bus movie with Neo. Shit. Okay, so it doesn’t need to maintain a certain speed, but it sure does like to go fast and keep on schedule because...reasons? And the nature of the train is, no surprise, keep humanity alive while keeping everyone in their place. It’s not like it’s hidden, it’s quite blatant in letting us know that. Almost painfully so.
From director Bong Joon-Ho, he’s done some other intriguing stuff (made some waves with Parasite not too long back, The Host was pretty messed up kaiju movie, or however you pronounce it. Big Monsters Attack! That’s pretty wordy though). I hate to say I get Bong a bit transmorgafied with Park Chan-Wook of Oldboy fame, mostly because I went through a big South Korean film binge awhile back and their stuff was pretty interesting, and has some of the same actors too so it’s all a bit befuddled. Stupid beerses. Based off an older French graphic novel or somesuch, it’s not so much a story as a lesson. Funny that they cast John 1984 Hurt in it, and a young Chris “Captain America” Evans does ok with it I guess. South Korean actor Song Kang-ho (also in The Host and Parasite) does the best job here though I think. And Tilda Swinton as one creepy freak. Overall, it’s an okay look class society in a compressed environment.
I saw they were putting out a series on this. I read it went woefully wrongs. That’s what you get for extending a bad allegory for longer than you should (The Walking Dead, I’m looking at you [both the comic and the TV series]). Is it a horrible movie? Eh, not the worst. Just pretty heavy-handed in the delivery of what we should all recognize as “The Message” of...climatechangeclasswarfareeatzebugz noncery. Complete and Utter. Noncery.
